it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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