you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
he thought i was a dude.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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