That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
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