I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
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