i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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