I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
