forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I just want to make out with him forever
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Randomize
