whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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