I smell stomach acid.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Randomize