I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
