what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
My penis needs a shock collar
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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