That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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