well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize