a queef is a wish your heart makes.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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