Porn is love you can see.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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