Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
