I feel like I'm in dance class right now
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize