I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize