yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
