Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize