actually, I'm a sock model
Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
