ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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