Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?

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(410): View more from Maryland

i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"

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(407): View more from Florida

just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?

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(914): View more from New York

my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.

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(773): View more from Illinois

You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.

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(305): View more from Florida

We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".

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(765): View more from Indiana

Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.

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(226): View more from Ontario

I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..

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