No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
