You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
