One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
