I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
