Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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