can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
