Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
