do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
