The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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