he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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