I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
