I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
