are you so shy because you have an std?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
