His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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