hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
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