Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
