I molested 6 butterflies tonight
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Randomize
