i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize