even my farts smell like vagina
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Randomize
