I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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