Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
