Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
