Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So vagazzling was a success
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize