Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize