he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize