Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
