She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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