And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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